Thursday, January 29, 2015

8 Toxic Beliefs Most People Think Are Normal


Sometimes in life, we can be our own worst enemies. Nothing is more evident of this than the toxic thoughts that most people carry around, and rarely give a second thought to… 

Professional life coaches Marc and Angel Chernoff have seen these same toxic thoughts throughout their travels and interactions with thousands of people. Marc explains, “As a veteran life coach who has now spent the better part of a decade coaching thousands of people online and offline, I realize that many of the toxic beliefs I struggled with earlier in life are actually quite common. I have literally seen the same toxic beliefs surface in the lives of new clients over and over again.” The problem is, that most people think these thoughts are completely normal, and so they never change. 

Here are the 8 Toxic Beliefs that Marc attributes to the majority of the general unhappiness he sees: 

The present is indicative of the future.

When things aren’t going well there’s a tendency to extrapolate and assume the future holds more of the same. For some strange reason this doesn’t happen as much when things are going well. A laugh, a smile and a warm fuzzy feeling are fleeting and we know it. We take the good times at face value in the moment for all they’re worth, and then we let them go. But when we’re depressed, struggling, or fearful, it’s easy to heap on more pain by assuming tomorrow will be exactly like today. This is a cyclic, self-fulfilling prophecy. If you don’t allow yourself to move past what happened, what was said, what was felt, you will look at your future through that same dirty lens, and nothing will be able to focus your foggy judgment. You will keep on justifying, reliving, and fueling a perception that shouldn’t have existed in the first place. 

It’s too late to make changes.

Life isn’t a straight line. There isn’t one right path for you or anyone else. And there isn’t a set timeline of milestones. But sometimes the pressure coming from peers, family, work, and society in general is enough to make us feel completely broken inside. If we don’t have the “right” job, relationship, lifestyle, and so forth, by a certain age or timeframe, we assume we’re somehow broken. And that’s not true at all. You’re allowed extra time when you need it. You’re allowed to backtrack. You’re allowed to figure out what inspires you at different stages of your life. Life is meant to be a series of zigs and zags. It should look like a mess, but a beautiful mess. So whatever situation you’re in right now, just know that it can change if you want it to. It’s up to you. You just have to turn yourself around and choose something new.

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